When times get really hard and you feel like you can’t take anymore, sometimes you can get kicked in the heart with yet another tragedy, challenge, incomprehensible loss.
This is how life has been for me and my sweet family this year. Details aside, what I will say is that we’ve been brought to our knees in ways I never imagined possible. I am humbled by life and allow the waves of despair, sadness, rage, and grief to wash over me daily.
I know the pandemic has greatly impacted so many of us. Add in more challenges like money stress, additional health issues, parenting children and teens, you name it, and almost everyone I know has been stretched beyond their limits.
If you are feeling stressed, lonely, or in despair, I’m reaching out my hand to you to let you know you are not alone. I will hold the vision of grace and wellness for you and your loved ones, and I would be so grateful if you would do the same for me and my family.
In the meantime, I wanted to share what has been helping me crawl through this sh*tshow and rest in the eye of the hurricane the best I can:
- Crying. A lot. I don’t mean shedding a few tears, I mean howling at the moon and sobbing uncontrollably while pounding my chest. The ugly cry provides a huge release and helps end the stress cycle in your body (thank you to the book Burnout by Emily Nagoski and Amelia Nagoski)
- Journaling your heart out. Journaling has been surprisingly helpful. I forgot how incredible it is to not have to hold back anything or be conscious of my impact on others. You don’t need to self-manage or care for anyone but you when you pour your soul onto the page.
- Get professional help. I got a new therapist just for me. Not for the family or for my marriage, but just for me. I also have called in my healers and bodyworkers and more. Many folks are even offering group healings at special or free rates to be of service.
- Reach out to The Universe. Call in your angels, guides, God, Divine, Love, ancestors for support. In my belief system, I believe I have folks rooting for me behind the veil. I feel my grandmother and my grandmother’s grandmothers and a sea of women and moms in my lineage supporting me. I ask angels and Mother Mary to hold me and show me the way. I offer up these challenges to them because it’s too much for me to bear alone, and The Divine doesn’t seem to reach capacity. Use whatever words work for you and your belief system and call in support.
- Move that body. No need to do anything extreme (hello Crossfit!) or fancy (Peloton bike, anyone?) unless that’s your jam. I’m talking about moving your beautiful body the best you can. Walk around the block, turn on your favorite music and dance or head out for a hike. I’ve been moving my body daily by jumping on the trampoline, walking the dogs, or even doing some simple stretches. Moving helps me remember that I’m not just a head or a heart, but a human being with a human body that needs to move. And the relief it provides it palpable. Thank you, endorphins.
- Lean into your community and ask for help when you need it. I don’t know how I would get through this storm without my inner circle of friends and family. Call, text, reach out and say YES to the support people offer you. If you need something, don’t wait for others to reach out to you. Reach out to them and tell them what you need. Many are willing to help, but may not realize you are hurting or could use an extra hand. Receive and receive and receive and receive. This can be such a challenge to do, but honor those who love you by letting them in and telling them how to support you. When you are back on your feet you can pay it forward and help someone in need too.
You are not alone. I hope the tips above serve as a reminder of some practical tools you can use to weather whatever storm you might be in.
May you feel peace in your heart. Somehow, someway.