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“I have it good, so why do I feel so bad?”


I’ve been speaking to so many clients, friends and loved ones who know, in their bones, how lucky and privileged they are to have what they have. They have their health, a roof over their head, food in the fridge, a job and career that pays the bills, and a circle of beloved friends and family.

And yet…

They still feel like crap. They are exhausted, agitated, overwhelmed and frustrated.

And then they beat themselves up because they know there is an abundance of suffering happening in the world right now. The inner dialogue goes something like:

“You should be grateful, what’s wrong with you?”

“Who are you to ask for more?

“Stop being a spoiled brat. Look at all you have!”

“Why are you such a whiner? You have so much privilege!”

That Inner Mean Girl and Inner Critic can be so…mean!

I hear you.

You are not alone.

Let’s do a step by step process to help, shall we?

Step One: Take a moment to allow yourself to tell the truth about how hard these past few years have been. Pause and breathe and simply feel all the feels of despair, isolation and stress.

Feeling the dark feelings and giving them space with no resistance is your first step.

Step two: After you’ve felt your truth, the next step is to find authentic gratitude for what you have. Not as a form of self-punishment or to induce guilt, but as a celebration and a deep appreciation. Drop the shame! Shaming yourself doesn’t help anyone or fuel you to make a difference

Step Three: Let yourself dream of what you deeply desire next. It’s OK to want more. It’s not selfish or tone deaf. It’s the human experience.

Step Four: Rest and allow inspiration to bubble up. From that space of overflow, see how you can give back and contribute to the world and your community.

The pandemic, wars, racial injustice, rights being taken away, inflation, global warming (and on and on) are cruel beasts to reckon with. Add in your personal circumstances and challenges. It is normal to feel overwhelm.

Most everyone I speak to these days is vacillating between gratitude and despair (with moments of breakthrough joy sprinkled in). We are over it. We crave human connection and space to dream again. It’s OK. You don’t need to feel guilt and shame for simply being human.

You’re doing a good job!

With compassion and love,





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© Amy Ahlers | Wake Up Call Coaching 2023

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Wake Up Call Coaching

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