Dear One,
I wanted to update you as well to let you know that the very day we dropped off Rocky Blue at the rescue group’s adoption fair, he was adopted by a young woman who fell in love with him. YES! That means that he never had one night without a home. And I know in my heart he was meant to be with us as our teacher for 6 months and is now settling into his forever home. I’m eternally grateful when The Universe conspires like this.
Among the dozens of lessons this experience has taught me, one in particular stands out: the idea of who we THINK we are. Who our ego tries to convince us we are and when we bump up against a situation or challenge that pushes us outside our perceived identity, it kinda…well…f*cks us up. 
For me, I never thought in a million years I’d be the type of person to return a rescue dog to a rescue group.
The act of doing just that shattered a part of my identity and had me look at myself differently. I had an “Inner Mean Girl attack,” where my Inner Critic raked me over the coals for a day or so. (Thank goodness I have so many tools to help!) When we commit an act that feels contrary to who we think we are we open ourselves up to some very harsh Big Fat Lies. (i.e. “I should be better than this.” “I hate people who do things like this and now that person is ME!” etc.)
But it also showed me what my highest priorities truly are: to honor my husband, to honor my family, and to honor my limits. (Guess I’m not superwoman after all. DARN!) And it allows me to have access to compassion that I didn’t even know existed. I stop the harsh judgments of others who have done such things and realize that I can never know what others are going through.
Case in point: I never thought in a million years that I would actually be a published author signing her second book deal. Yet here I am. Now experiences like this also opens us up to another type of Inner Mean Girl attack. One that fills our heads with Big Fat Lies like “Who are you to deserve this?” or “They’re going to find out you’re fraud.” or “You’re not worthy.”
So I’m curious, who do THINK you are? Try this exercise:
#1: Fill in the blank:
#2: Next, I want you to close your eyes and ask your Inner Wisdom what you’re learning. What are these experiences showing you about you?
“The more tightly we cling to a fixed view of ‘who I am,’ the more we cut ourselves off from the process of becoming, which of course is what’s happening in every moment.” -Nancy Bardacke
I’d love to see your responses (below). What does this exercise bring to the light for you? Who are YOU becoming?
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Let me know below your responses to the exercise below!
I never thought in a million years I’d ever be on long term disability for over a year due to a breakdown.
If you would have told me 20 years ago that I’d ever have three university degrees, including getting my Masters while a single mom, I would have said, “you’re nuts!”
I promised myself I’d never be in the same financial mess that my parents were when they divorced and yet here I am.
I surprised and delighted myself when I got my Master Reiki certification.
I am learning that when I make a decision that I know at my core is right for me, I will be successful in achieving whatever I set my mind to. I am learning that I am imperfectly perfect and that so many people have an ache inside them–for whatever reason–about themselves. I am learning connection is love. I am learning to receive, to be brave, to trust, to flow and to feel.
It is an exciting time and this time off work is a gift to me from the universe. I am learning I am exactly where I am supposed to be.
Thanks Amy! You have been part of my transformational journey and I send you love and gratitude.
xoxox
Dear Amy, I survived a massive stroke at age 30, 5 years ago, leaing me without many of the abilities we all take for granted each day.. if amyone had told me 5 years ago that all the light in my life and spirit would return, that i’d be able to walk normally again, that i’d be able to use my left hand, I would have shrugged my shoulders, cried my eyes out, and said “yeah right, only if you believe in miracles!!” Thankfully I learned a prayer/meditation that I used daily with my eyes closed, sometimes multiple times a day, “Dear God, help me to remember the truth about myself, no matter how beautiful it is” …to meditate on this daily was powerful beyond measure. I’ve learned I am so much more than who I thought I was, and surviving and thriving are ot the same thing!
With a full heart xo,
Melessia
Melessia,
Thank you SO MUCH for posting this inspiring story. I LOVE your prayer. Stunning.
So happy you’ve allowed miracles into your life.
With much love,
Amy